


Somnia Memorias

by Brim



Category: Granblue Fantasy (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amnesia, M/M, Mutual Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-000 AU, Resurection Au, a bit of misunderstandings because ofc, another サンルシ lucifer lives au, sanluci
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-06
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-04-11 15:39:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19112689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brim/pseuds/Brim
Summary: Beyond the dreams and beyond the memories, they found each other again deep in the forests.post-000 resurrection!au: sandalphon finds lucifer alive, but without memories. lucifer lives a simple life caring for the land





	1. Chapter 1

_“Someone calls me…Someone looks for me…”_

…

 The first night after the grand battle versus Lucilius and his following defeat, Sandalphon fell in a deep, undisturbed slumber for several days. Exhaustion turned his sleep into oblivion – no nightmares plagued his mind and no dreams distracted him from his rest. When he woke up, he felt as if he was reborn and for once since a very long time, his heart was at peace. The familiar faces of the crew, his dear friends, were there to greet him once he opened his eyes.  
“You were sleeping so peacefully we didn’t want to disturb you!”

“Grumplephon’s usual grumpy expression was so relaxed, he looked like a sleeping baby!”

“Nonsense.” He folded his arms and looked away, trying to hide the embarrassment dusting his pale cheeks with a weak frown. The crew laughed and he couldn’t help, but laugh as well.

  Life continued and for the first time since 2000 years, Sandalphon felt like he was actually living. The time period since his escape from Pandemonium until the showdown with the fallen angels felt like a distant, hazy memory. As if he was walking a fog.

  However, no matter how much time passes there was still that pain in his chest when it came to thinking about Lucifer. His life. His struggle. His hopes and wishes. His death. The pain only dulled when he was around others, but when he was alone, in the night’s darkness and wrapping himself tightly with his blanked, as if trying to mimic the familiar warmth of the protective cocoon, Sandalphon wept. Perhaps because of his longing, perhaps because of his aching heart, Sandalphon continued wishing that things were different. Sometimes his mind, assaulted by treacherous hopes, tried to picture Lucifer alive. Him smiling every morning at him when they sat down for coffee. Him living a peaceful, uneventful life. Him simply being _alive_.

   It was then that the weird dreams started. In them he saw a vision of Lucifer. Like a distant mirage, Lucifer was seated in their usual spot by the garden, with a cup of coffee in front of him and a second cup opposite to him. The setting and placement was exactly as Sandalphon remembered it 2000 years ago. Selfishly trying to experience that same peace from that distant memory, Sandalphon walked ahead. He took only a few steps until he was forced to stop. There was something preventing him from moving forward. As if there was an invisible, impenetrable wall in front of him. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t reach him. No matter how much he called, he wasn’t heard.

   Lucifer remained completely unreachable in his dreams. Every night, the same dream repeated in the exact same manner, as if taunting Sandalphon and his futility. Lucifer was dead and there was nothing he could do about it. Ever after saving the world and defeating Lucilius, it wouldn't change that simplest of facts. 

 _He’s dead. Lucifer is dead. Dead. Dead! Dead_!! He repeated over and over like a mantra as he continued trying to break through the transparent wall, banging with his fists until they bled. 

_And it was all my fault!_

Eventually, the reoccurring dream stopped and Sandalphon didn’t know why. He thought that instead of this being another attempt to reach Lucifer, it was his mind and thoughts weaponized against him again. Or perhaps he was replaying a distant memory. Whatever it was, in the end he concluded that it was just nonsense born from his misery.

  The peaceful days continued, living surrounded by his friends on the crew and enjoying mundane things. But to one Sandalphon, there was still restlessness underlying his happiness. Sometimes Lyria noticed the sadness in his red eyes and she squeezed his hand reassuringly, as if trying to remind him that he wasn’t alone in his struggle. Sandalphon appreciated it.

“Are you alright?” The captain asked him sometimes too.

“I’m fine.” His worries went unsaid. Some things are better left unsaid.

   It wasn’t until about half a year later that he saw other archangels.

“Hey, Sandalphon!”

“It’s been a while, Sandy.” It was dusk when the twin primarch of instructions visited him on the upper deck. Or former primarch – them and the other primarchs retired and although the position of Supreme Primarch became essentially meaningless, Sandalphon still continued keeping his watch over the skies. Just in case Lucilius and his goons returned.

“Halluel. Malluel. What brings you here?” His voice was too serious for a meeting between friends. Old habits die hard and he was still used to them acting as the _archangel express of doomsday_.

“You never change do you, huh?”

“I think no matter how matter how much time passes, he’ll always be our cute little Sandy.” Malluel giggled and Halluel chuckled as well. Sandalphon closed his eyes, exhaling. _Some things really don’t change._

“I’m sorry. So to what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you two?” He tried to manage a light smile on his face. He seemed to be getting better at it, because both angels gasped. Malluel even covered her mouth as she did so.

“Look at that Malluel! It’s a blue moon!” They held onto each other so that they don’t fall down to the bottom of the sky from the sheer shock of seeing him smile.

“I see it. I see it! It really is beautiful…”

“Hey!” There was another dramatically exasperated exhale. “In any case, how are you? How are things at your side?”

“We’ve been doing good. Az and Iss’ recovery is slow…but they are doing well too!” There was a hint of sadness in Malluel’s eyes and Halluel squeezed her hand reassuringly. Nightmares from the past plagued them too. Sandalphon understood.

“What about you? Lyria wrote to us that you were going to open a coffee shop aboard the Grancypher and we were waiting for our invitation.”

 _That blue-haired girl talks a lot._ Sandalphon entertained the idea a lot the past few months, but he never really moved into realizing that plan. It started out as rambling, and carried by his friends’ enthusiasm, there was a plan in the making, but it remained just that – a plan. So far at least.

“Fine, if you want to drink coffee so much, I’ll be happy to show you a new technique I’ve learned.”

“Yes! I’m sure we can discuss the news over a nice cup of coffee. We rushed here so fast, my wings are sore.”

“The news?” Sandalphon’s interest piqued. It turned out he was right in assuming their visit wasn’t entirely a social call.

“Oh yeah! We found Lucifer!” Both Halluel and Malluel’s expression turned so serious that there was no way it could be a joke or a prank.

  And so, as if the world suddenly stopped, so did Sandalphon. All thought processes ceased and the only thing Sandalphon could mutter was.

“What?”

“We found him, Sandy. He’s alive!” The happiness of their find washed over them again and their eyes shone wet with joy. For his part, Sandalphon almost cried out as well.

“Lucifer…is alive?” He could barely speak due to his complete disbelief. The angels nodded.

  Excitement, but also _dread_ bubbled in his chest. _Is Lucifer really alive? Is it him? How did he come back? Where is he? Is he safe? Why didn’t he reach out to me--_

“Sandalphon!” Halluel’s voice brought him back to reality and Sandalphon looked down, realizing that his hands were shaking. He blinked, trying to will the tears away with all of his strength and maintain a facade of calmness. 

“Did you …call him?”

“Of course not!" Halluel’s tone was light and she was clearly underestimating Sandalphon’s sheer shock as happiness.

“We wanted you to be the first one to meet him.” Malluel clarified and Sandalphon slowly shook his head in thought. He was given an opportunity and a choice. Without thinking it deeply, without rationalizing it any further, he gave his answer without hesitation.

“Please…tell me where he is.”

…

  

  There was a small island in the outskirts of Phantagrande. It didn’t have any major trade routes near it, nor was it a tourist destination. Outsiders were a rarity. The people from this island had a simple, mundane lifestyle, living off the land. They were generous and nature had been kind to him.

   The forest was thick and the path was unforgiving. There was an early morning mist. Daylight hadn’t burned off the fog yet and the chill bit into his skin. It didn’t stop him, nor did it matter – if you missed the best day to pick wild herbs, that means you missed the entire spring. He crouched down, collecting a few weeds by the base of a great, moss covered tree and put them in the big basked strapped to his back. There was a small book attached to his belts. An old man from the village was kind enough to lend him an encyclopedia. Occasionally he sat down on a tree stump, to look up different plants and to rest. There was also a pickaxe he carried to dig out and cut herbs. It also served as a supporting cane whenever he climbed up the slippery, moss-covered rock to search in the higher fields.

   No other soul in sight, it was just him and the birdsong. Occasionally there was a deep inhale or a tired sigh. As it got later and later in the morning, it got warmer and warmer. His boots almost dried off the morning dew by the time he was done and it was time to head back.The way back was far easier compared to the way up. His strode down the forest path with careful steps. Exhaustion could make your feet wobble and he couldn’t afford falling – injuries made work harder.

   When he got back to his home, he put the basked on his worktable outside and started sorting the various herbs he picked. After he was done, he grabbed a rake and started working on his garden. His garden was a small patch of land on the side of his cottage. His house was a simple building, located in a glade deep in the forest. It was a hermit’s location and it had been abandoned for decades until he started living there. At first it was difficult, because the condition was barely livable and winter was coming. Luckily, he never got sick and little by little, he worked on fixing it. Cleaning out the trash, fixing the holes on the roof and the loose wood in the walls – it started looking like someone was actually living there. It wasn’t luxurious, but it was his.  

   Villagers advised him against living there – it wasn’t close to the village and there were monsters in the forest. Some even offered to welcome him into their homes and he kept politely refusing. It wasn’t that he was afraid or that he was stupid – his life was simple and he wished to live a life in which he didn’t burden anyone else. Also, perhaps whatever witch lived in this his home prior wasn’t a bad one. The place was blessed, because monsters never dared to come near him.

    Every day, Lucifer did something different, because there was a lot of work to do and he was just a lone person. People were kind and generous – offering help or giving him advice when needed, but there was still too much to do. Frequently he went to the villager for supplies or to find manual labor.

“Young man that looks like a uniform. Were you a former knight serving a king? Maybe if you wore your armor when you’re in the city, someone will recognize you!”

   He took the man’s advice to heart and did so. However doing farm work with armor on was difficult, so whenever he didn’t need it, he stored his armor in a trunk under his bed. However, sometimes there was doubt in his heart and he wondered – is it alright? Maybe he wasn’t meant to return? Maybe he was meant to live like this? Maybe the fact that he couldn’t remember anything prior to half a year ago was final?  Should he want to return to whatever life he lived previous? 

   There were peculiarities - a ritual of sorts he followed religiously. It was a small luxury in his simple life. Each and every single morning, before heading to work, he indulged with a cup of coffee by his little kitchen’s window. It evolved into a certain routine and every time, oddly, he felt compelled to make a second cup, as if he was waiting for someone. He didn’t understand why nor its purpose – nobody ever came to visit him to this secluded place. Morning after morning, the second cup remained undrunk on his kitchen table, until he returned in the evening. With a heavy heart, Lucifer had to throw it away every night, but making just one cup for himself felt like an even bigger waste. 

  Lucifer didn’t know. There were many things he didn’t know, nor understand, but he was stubborn and so was his curiosity. He would see the truth to his origin no matter what. 

 _Working on the land brings me peace._ But although his thoughts were sometimes hazy and his mind sometimes confused, no matter how tried he hard, he couldn’t imagine having any life different than this. _It’s like I’m being reborn._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! I appreciate your feedback
> 
> well time for another ressurection au, t  
> his one post-000 because...coping.  
> this AU is something I shared with my friend after paradise lost last year and she did her own version too. it was originally adapted for post paralost, but I decided to -finally- do mine as well, and tweak it to be post-000.
> 
> I have a -plot- and -ending- planned but wasnt sure how many chapters to put it as so for now its gonna be at ? but prob gonna be 10 or so... stay tuned for more if you wish!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sandalphon makes another selfish choice.

_"Ah, Sandalphon!" The blue-haired girl noticed him before he could sneak out. "Where are you going out so early?"_

_He stopped dead in his tracks. Truth or a deceit, the decision was his to make. Sandalphon swallowed._

_“Lyria?” A wry smile was practically plastered on his nervous face – it had been a while since he lied to someone he cared about. “There’s an errand I wanted to do in a nearby island. I’ll be back for lunch.”_

_“Hmm…” Lyria gave him a thoughtful look and then nodded. “Okey! Have a safe trip, Sandalphon.”_

_She smiled and Sandalphon thought it was very selfish of him to relax his nerves for managing to pull the wool over her eyes. Since he had been with the crew, they went through many disasters and trials. Their bonds strengthened and Sandalphon felt that, clumsily, but one-step at a time, he was moving forward._

_However, in that one moment that followed after he lied to Lyria, Sandalphon felt like he was a worse villain than when he rampaged against the skies._

 

…

   The island was so small that it absent on most maps of the sky. Sandalphon doubted whether it was the right place, but those doubts disappeared the moment he stepped on the island and he felt that very distinct aura. Lucifer’s presence was faint, a tingling candle compared to the blinding radiance he once was, but it was unquestionably there.

 _Lucifer…_ Another whirlpool of questions gather at the back of his mind and clouded his vision with worry.

“Told you it was him!” Halluel and Malluel were waiting for him on the fog covered flower fields at the outskirts of said island. The air was chilly, but that was never a detriment to primals and their immortal bodies forges as tools of war. Still, the anxiety was there and Sandalphon involuntarily shivered to the cool early morning breeze.

“Lucifer...is really alive.” It mixed with his anticipation and Sandalphon’s feet refused to move towards his destination. If it wasn’t for Halluel and Malluel nudging him, he would have remained at the edge of the island for the rest of the day.

“C’mon Sandalphon!”

“Let’s go, let’s go!” Both urged him.

“I…” He started, carefully picking his next words. “I’m sorry, but can I see him alone?” Truly, Sandalphon considered, he was becoming the most selfish villain, but Halluel nodded knowingly and Malluel gave him a warm smile. They both understood.

“Need you ask?” Halluel quipped and Malluel giggled. “We know how much this means for you, Sandy. So we’ll let you have your talk with him as long as needed.”

“While we wait, we’ll be picking flowers around here! Malluel and I wanted to make a flower crown to surprise Az with and the flowers here are so pretty it’s hard to resist.” Malluel grasped Halluel’s hand, gently pulling her away. Sandalphon nodded slowly and managed a meek smile on his lips. He relaxed his clenched fists and pushed himself to move towards his destination.

“Thank you…”

    Finally he marched forward. The moisture from the morning dew glossed his boots and the soil under his feet was so soft his heels kept sinking in it. Idly he entertained the thought of flying there, but didn’t know how Lucifer would react to the revelation of how comfortable he’d grown with his position as the Supreme Primarch.

“I wonder if that person …would be happy to hear about my progress.” _From a discardable chess piece on the board, to a valiant protector and valuable ally._

 

 ...

   The presence was so faint, that he found that small glade by sheer coincidence. Sandalphon idled briefly by the side of house, listening to the rustling leaves and trying to think.

   It was confusing. Lucifer was there, but at the same time it was as if he wasn’t. The outside of the house looked no different than any villagers’ home he saw during his numerous journeys with the crew. The odd thing was that the house was so far away from the nearest settlement that it could pass for abandoned. 

    It was a perfect place to hide.

 _Why is he back? Why is he here? What is he doing here…?_ There was a numb feeling in his chest as he walked up to the door, one step followed by another in complete uncertainty. He hesitantly knocked on the old wooden door and heard a shuffle behind it.

    When the door opened, Sandalphon forgot how to breathe.

“Ah, good morning.” Lucifer blinked in surprise. That brief moment of wonder passed and the former supreme primarch smiled. It was a familiar smile, so gentle yet agonizing when Sandalphon thought it lost forever. “Are you lost?”

“Lucifer!!” Sandalphon gasped in surprise. It was too surreal to be real. Perhaps Sandalphon was about to wake up from whatever dream his brain conjured up again, but it was real, too real. Lucifer was there, alive and smiling. There was a warmth and kindness in his expression.

“Do I know you?” But there was no recognition in his eyes.

    Something in Sandalphon’s chest contracted painfully, as if he’d been stabbed by Lucilius’ blade again.

“What is the meaning of this?” He uttered, his voice low.

“Excuse me?”

“Why…Why are you playing with me?!” His tone turned more demanding and he almost stuttered at the end. Suddenly Lucifer’s welcoming smile seemed even crueler than the reassuring one he constantly offered him when he was the Supreme Primarch.  

“Do you know anything about me?” There was a small light in Lucifer’s eyes, like a twinkling star in a sea of blue. Sandalphon gaped at him. However before his anger could even manifest and flare, his emotions simmered down to a chilling dread.

“No.” The denial came quick and merciless, without a single thought of hesitation.

    And that light dimmed.

“I see…” Lucifer closed his eyes. There was a difficult expression on his face and Sandalphon mentally cursed himself again. _Even without his memories…I can disappoint him._ “Regardless, you are my guest. Would you like to join me for coffee?”

   Out of reflex, Sandalphon agreed. What followed afterwards felt like he was enthralled, moving by some higher force of need, rather than thought. Lucifer opened the door wider and invited him into his home.

“This place is …” Sandalphon didn’t finish. The room was too dim and bare for it to be exactly like he remembered it, but the reminiscence was without a doubt…

_The gazebo...Subconsciously, he remembers…_

“Ah, I apologize…for the condition. I tried to fix it as much as I was able to, but I’m just one person and there is a lot of work to do...” Lucifer’s voice trailed off. His voice was light, but his tone was as stiff as when he was the Supreme Primarch.

“D-don’t worry about it. I think you did a good job.” He tried to keep his tone casual as well, but there was nervousness in his laughter. Lucifer gave him a studying look, but didn’t say anything. A part of Sandalphon felt like things reverted to when he first met him.

    It flustered Sandalphon.

“I’m sorry about earlier... I made a mistake.” Lucifer’s sincerity and genuine lack of recognition towards him prompted Sandalphon to stutter out and apology. He quickly switched back to his usual polite demeanor when he spoke to strangers and Astral scientists.

“It’s alright.” Lucifer’s tone didn’t betray anything. He moved to his small kitchen in the corner of the room to prepare the coffee.

   Still, it was an absurd situation, Sandalphon felt like another plaything of fate. By some miracle or curse, Lucifer was not dead, but he was missing his memories and was severely depowered. The latter he understood why – after all the wings and his powers now belonged to the Sandalphon, but the former was still a mystery.

“Why are you living so far away from the villagers?” Sandalphon asked him when Lucifer brought the pot to the table. Lucifer gave him another studying look.

“The villagers helped me and gave me this place. Since then I’ve been living here.” He turned his back to Sandalphon again and went to fetch two cups. “And what of you? What brings you here?”

    Momentarily, Sandalphon’s mind went blank for the third time that day.

“I’m a skyfarer. The crew I belong to send me on an errand.” He adjusted the lie he told to Lyria. Sandalphon was never a good liar and he didn’t want to strangle himself in a web of lies. 

“Is that so?” Lucifer’s voice trailed off again and Sandalphon moved in his seat uncomfortably, trying to adjust himself. Whatever this _amnesiac_ Lucifer was thinking, he choose not to share. His mind remained an enigma to Sandalphon even now.

   When Lucifer returned to the table, he was holding two cups and a small jar of sugar. He poured in Sandalphon’s cup first and put the jar down next to him. Sandalphon snorted.

“I drink mine black.”

“Simple is best they say.” Lucifer poured in his own as well and sat down. Sandalphon stared at his cup before, hesitantly picking it up and lifting it to his mouth. It seemed like Lucifer had missed his caution for he was instead looking out of the window towards the field and the forest _. Too familiar._ Sandalphon wanted to laugh, but instead took a sip from his cup and he gasped.

  Two thousand year old coffee was hard to forget.

“Are you alright?”

   With worry, Lucifer reached out to him and Sandalphon realized that the corners of his eyes were stinging and there was something heavy, lumpy in his throat. It took him everything in his being, all his strength to hold back a sob as he tried to keep his expression neutral. 

“I’m sorry, it’s just…” Overwhelmed, he didn’t continue. Lucifer patiently waited for him to calm himself down.

   It was real. Lucifer was alive, but lacking memories of himself, of Sandalphon, of his past and of his death.

 

…

“Will I see you again?” Sandalphon’s back was turned to him, so he missed the worried look Lucifer had on his face.  

“Maybe.” The Supreme Primarch hesitantly answered, unsure of his return.

   It was a dilemma – on one hand, Sandalphon couldn’t describe just how happy he felt that Lucifer was alive and well, he also understood that without his memories Lucifer, his Lucifer, wasn’t _back_. However, considering the misery plaguing Lucifer’s life and death…was it Sandalphon’s right to make the choice for him and bring him back to that life when he could have this life, living in in ignorant bliss?

   But even then, Sandalphon wanted to …wanted nothing more but to…

“I would be happy to share another cup of coffee with you.” _My new, old friend._

   It hurt too much to refuse, so Sandalphon nodded.

 

_…_

“Ah, Sandalphon! How did it go?”

“Oh, Sandy came back alone…”

    With clenched fists, Sandalphon surrendered to his selfish desires and asked them for another favor.

 _Please don’t tell anyone._ Halluel and Malluel were shocked, but Sandalphon pleaded for more time to think and eventually they agreed.

    That marked the beginning of more secrets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not dead, I was just coping  
> ahem, thank you for reading and sorry for the delayed update(s)!  
> mayday gave me much to think about but not as much as summercio gave me existential dread 
> 
> uh, on a serious note, I do plan and want to continue this even if I need to adjust a few things, its just that it might get a bit ...slow (lol, looks at last update and cries) because of other ...projects + irl being a hassle


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